“Let’s Get Ready to Rumble — Fighting Fair in Relationships” — Part 3

iStock_000010870688Small Tool #2

Conflict Resolution Step-Ladder

Dr. David Olson, author of Prepare/Enrich marital enrichment program says, “Every couple has differences and disagreements. But healthy couples find ways to resolve marital disputes without turning them into marital wars. Couples who accept and appreciate the fact that their partner has independent opinions tend to reach successful and satisfying resolutions.”

The bottom line question is this, “Do you want to solve the conflict more than you want to be “right” or win the argument?”  When both partners get to the place where they can answer “yes” to this question, then they are ready to begin climbing the “Conflict Resolution step-ladder” in order to reach a satisfactory resolution at the top.

What Is a Conflict?

A conflict is a disagreement, struggle or battle over opposing issues or principles. The Latin word Conflictus means an “act of striking together or clashing with.”

What Are Some Facts about Conflict?

1. Conflict cannot be Avoided

John 16:33 — “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.” NIV

2. Conflict is not Bad.

Proverbs 27:17 – “As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.” NIV

3. Conflict requires action toward Peace.

Romans 14:19 – “Let us therefore make every effort to do what leads to peace and to mutual edification.” NIV

What Is the Difference between Resolution and Reconciliation?

A Resolution and reconciliation are different.

• Resolution means “finding the Answer.”

• Reconciliation means “restoring to Harmony.”

Some differences may never be resolved, but you can still be reconciled to those with whom you differ. God requires only that, as far as it is possible, you seek to be at peace with everyone.

Romans 12:18 – “If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.” NIV

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